The 10 people you see at a coffee shop

By 530medialab Collaborator — / Death Wish Coffee Blog

What kind of people will I see at a coffee shop?

Icing on pastries and froth on my latte. Sipping espresso with sweet yogurt parfaits. Donut filled boxes tied up all in strings. These are a few of my favorite things!

Hipsters with glasses and interns on missions. Students and teachers and writers with visions. All on the hunt for strong coffee, cha-ching. These are a few of my favorite things!

If your favorite past-time is the coffee shop, you know what I’m talking about. If you’ve ever sat in a café chair for more than an hour, these are the people that are likely to catch your eye — Every. Single. Time.

1. The Instagram Snob:

Their best life is on social media. If you want to know what they’re up to, just take a peek at their Instagram.  If they’re at the coffee shop, you’ll know. Trust me.

What they drink:
Anything with foam or latte art, worthy of a snap. They’re just too pretty to drink, don’t you think?

2. The Intern:

Frantically ordering before she forgets what she needs. Did Billy want 2 shots of espresso? Did Sally say extra foam? Why the hell didn’t I write this down?

What they drink:

A small latte, keeping it simple for their first internship.

3. The coffee date:

Typically, you’ll find the couples at a corner table, whispering secrets and laughing together. Coffee dates are the best kind of dates. 

What they drink:
Whatever the special of the season is, keeping their relationship in the moment.

4. The stressed-out student: 

Barely visible behind their pile of textbooks, sobbing about finals week.

What they drink:
An endless supply of black coffee.

5. The Regular: 

Rolling in like clockwork, knowing what they want, and wanting it ready for them as they walk through the door. Comfortable enough to kick their shoes off. And don’t forget to stamp their loyalty card.

What they drink:
A tall, non-fat latte with a caramel drizzle, just because it sounds good.

6. That one person who constantly asks for her drink to be remade:

The perfectionist, continuously demanding a new drink because let’s face it, they don’t know what they want in life. Go home, Carol.

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What they drink:

Nothing. They just keep sending it back until they get so frustrated they leave.

7.  The women meeting up before their hot yoga class for some fuel: 

What better way to start your day than coffee and yoga for some peace of mind?

What they drink:
Anything non-fat and sugar-free.

8. The Hipster:

Diving into a new book, with a pretentious title, begging for someone to ask them about what they’re reading.

What they drink:
Pumpkin spiced latte. 

9. The person with a "home office"

Forget the idea of a home office — They're the person taking up two tables with paperwork and their computer. 

What they drink: A sample of everything since they're there all day

10. Tourists: 

They often look lost. Those in line behind them typically can’t wait for them to make up their damn mind about what they want so everyone else can get on with their lives.

What they drink:
Flat white or Americano.

If you’d like me to break it down for you, sometimes, going to the coffee shop is like going to the zoo. You’ve got all of these overly-caffeinated animals roaming around and spilling their drinks. My best piece of advice? Tip your cup and join the espresso-drenched jungle.

Related: How to not be intimidated at a high end coffee shop: A guide


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