People Are Saying That Valhalla Java Is "God Like" And I Can't Help But Agree
By Sierra Meisser — / Death Wish Coffee Blog
You’ve tried our original Death Wish blend, and now it’s got you hooked (I hope!). Suddenly, you feel an inner awakening – and it’s not just the jitters from finishing off your first coffee pot of the day. No, this is something greater, mightier even. It’s “a blend of good and evil” – a bright spark from the very depths of your soul that calls upon you to “pillage and plunder”. Enter the Valhalla Java Odinforce blend – a coffee forged from the volcanic soils of Indonesia and nutrient-rich soils of Central and South America for the world's most powerful guitarist, Zakk Wylde.
If you’re going to put a coffee blend like this one into words, you’ve got to do it justice. So, I called upon the one league that could – the people brewing up with it on the daily. If anyone could accurately describe the Valhalla Java’s strength for all humankind to understand, it’s the Death Wish Coffee Company Community. Here’s what they said.
Kyle L. said, “Valhalla Java Odinforce Blend provides Odin, King of the Norse Gods, with vast strength, stamina and durability far greater than a normal Asgardian, along with resistance to all Earthly diseases and toxins, incredible resistance to magic and, as a courtesy of the Valhalla Java Odinforce Blend, a greatly extended lifespan. Perfect for mere mortals, too!”
George P. described the blend as the gift to those mortals brave enough to absorb it. - “From Odin the Father of men, comes Valhalla Java - the coffee of the gods, gifted to human kind to vanquish the slumber of Nótt.”
Carol B. described the Valhalla Java as, “Valhalla: a wylde blend of taste and caffeine to make you soar with the Valkyrie!”
Wendy Morey N. keeps it real. This is the blend you need to awaken the go, go, go of being human. She said, “The stressors of real life... Alarm clock goes off and you hit the floor running, three kids to get to the bus, missing shoes, dog to feed, sibling fighting, lunches made, bundle those babies up for school! Grab your go mug and bag and get yourself and them out the door for the bus, OMG, three minutes late, if I miss that bus my whole day is screwed.... bus just pulling up run to corner to put kids on bus while not tripping over dog leash. Pause to wave goodbye, put dog back in house and get in car.....ahhhhhhh taking your first sip of Vahalla sanity...finally, 10 seconds of heaven.... Andddddddd go! You've got to be at work in 15 min....... Cake, you got this.”
Matt K. knows you’re missing out if you pass on brewing up Odinforce (I’m looking at you, tea drinkers). He said, “Valhalla Java. Smooth godlike coffee. So smooth it will make you think you can fight a cougar. If you don’t drink it then %*#+ you...”
The sheer force of this blend lies behind these simple words by Ray G., “Strong enough for Vikings yet made for mere mortals.”
Now that you’re starting to grasp the power behind our mighty Odinforce blend, I must ask. Do you bleed black?